Ink

        I've always said one of the things i found missing from most review sites is movies that they love or find dear to their heart and I've always love to introduce people to movies they haven't seen or most likely haven't so here it goes. Today I Bring you Ink A lovely little Indie Film made with an obvious shoestring budget but works well with what it has. this movie is without spoilers about Dreams and specifically about the idea that Good and bad dreams are brought on by good and bad sides in a war that is forever raging. Generally speaking this could easily take on religious overtones and yet it manages to steer clear of that and still deeply investigate the human Psyche.
 The movie does more with its film effects and simple camera tricks than most people do with a full multi-million dollar box office hit does and for a movie that has very little dialogue get every point driven home beautifully this is I believe a must see movie for anyone looking to make a small budget production with world building ambitions. This movie gets an honest 9/10 for me because even with every flaw it had the movie evokes a bit of every emotion at appropriate times and pacing never slowing down so much to be dull and never going off course. I try generally to find movies everyone can have easy access to and this one is perhaps the easiest it is in full for free on YouTube Check it out if you're looking for a good movie with both action and Food for thought.

Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared Syn

Do you remember when to make a post apocalyptic movie all you needed was a over abundance of costume jewelry, enough eye shadow for the whole cast male and female, a leather jumpsuit, and a lot of plastic shoulder pads? welcome to Metalstorm: the Destruction of Jared Syn. where the Cuts between scenes are weird and the scenes between dialogue are weirder love takes a day and a half to bloom and chase scenes are shot by strapping a camera to the hood of their weird looking cars. And everything in the world is based on crystals... including magic? this movie is weird and can't seem to decide what its doing weather it wants to be a sci-fi fantasy or a post apocalyptic piece, best way i can explain the setting is if a poor mans version of Star Wars and a Poorer mans version of Road warrior had a weird fucked up flipper baby and then that made a child with Krull then you would have Metalstorm... well almost... also add a 5 pound bag of Dull and your probably on the money for making Metalstorm.  common questions i was asking while watching this movie were "whats happening? Why is it happening? where are we? and simply what?"

 I suppose i should try and actually give you a plot summary of some kind but I'm not exactly sure what just happened in front of my eyes Also i can only remember 3 peoples names in this whole movie. Best i got random girl and dad are mining crystals in a cave when they get attacked by a one armed cyborg for mining where they were random girl hides in cave while dad takes the Gack attack and gets his life force drained into a crystal. the cyborg leaves and Dogen shows up to ask all sorts of questions of the girl then they leave to go ask PVC dude what the crystal they found is and figure out its a life force USB drive. The Tech to USB life force is from McGuffen City and no one has ever been there before except this one guy Rhodes so the go to find Han Solo... i mean Rhodes. meanwhile a connection is made between cyborg and obviously evil shoulder pads man who i didn't know was Jared Syn till 45 minutes into the movie i thought it was one armed cyborg. Shoulder pads wants to rule the world so he got a huge magic crystal that does whatever plot convenience says it does so he steals girl from Dogen via teleport crystal. Now Dogen has to find Rhodes, Kill  One armed Cyborg, and go after Shoulder pads.

Apparently from the minimal research i did this was supposed to start a resurgence of 3-D but as it goes you'd need a basic; decent script first. the plot was silly and basic, the directing and camera ranged from weird to down right awful as was most of the Acting. With all of the bizarre choices in props, makeup, and scenes in general this movie looks to be little more than a jumbled mess. I give this movie a 2/10 if your movie is more confusing that cool re-think your editing job and just because your movie has 3-D available doesn't mean everything else that makes a movie good should suffer.
Special Thanks To Crash for the suggestion

gallowwalkers

well well well now.... a movie i went into expecting.. well I'll be honest i was expecting a Bloodrayne 2: Deliverance and this movie exceeded my expectations...but not by much. Wesley Snipes is in this apparently with a really silly looking beard ass a bad ass Cowboy zombie hunter. That's right this movie is specifically about zombie hunting in the wild west with vague religious overtones mixed with a bit of occult black magic just to spice it up. I'm going to start with what this movie did right 1. lots of real squibs and practical mixed with CG for all gore effects to make them look decent. 2.Perhaps the coolest effect that is thrown into the movie is there for no reason or a silly reason but there is a guy with nothing but muscle tissue on his body and it looks fantastic. 3. Wesley Snipes.
Unfortunately as Far as everything else goes its a little silly or badly tied together. Issues range from Bad Cuts between scenes, terrible establishing shots, Forgettable characters, strangely filmed gunfights, and a villain who is Maniacal laughter, mustache twirling, evil. Now can i say i was bored with the movie not at all but can i say i was entertained for the right reasons or emotionally invested in the characters? Definitely not. i just finished watching the movie 20 minutes ago and i couldn't tell you a single name of any character in the movie.
For my bit i give this a 4.5/10 it still held my interest and it was kind of fun even if they lingered on their CG and desert establishing shots for a few minutes too long. I've seen a similar story told worse but i can't say this was new, refreshing, thought provoking, or particularly well acted as a whole.If you like the idea though effects and production value wise its probably still worth a peep.

Side note if you're making a movie and you show a bunch of dead extras make sure that they don't blink a handful of times in the shot.

Aeon Flux

What can honestly be said for this movie. For those of you Old enough to remember Liquid TV on MTV this is a wholehearted disappointment. For Those who are completely unfamiliar with the series its simply a story told very poorly. This movie has some of the poorest choices when it comes to costuming, set design, special effects, and script in my opinion. With the added bonus of actually seeing the source material this movie fumbles to even come close to the feeling of the original show and the original show had stilted dialogue, questionable plot, and insane visuals. This movie suffers from the same live action adaptation issues that most comic, game, or cartoon movie tends to have which is trying to appeal to too large an audience with a more generic and dumbed down version of the plot. also probably doesn't exactly help when every character drones every line out 100% monotone.

  Basic Premise of the movie, Aeon Works with The Monicans a secret resistance group in the town of...monica? and they are fighting against the Goodchilds who run the government that...ummm....is... evil? All i know about their government is that all guards must wear motorcycle helmets and they do a lot of standing around on weird cement structures also the grass and tree gourds want to kill you. Ultimately the most evil thing we see the government do is make people disappear in the city. Which Spoiler we find out is because everyone in this world is sterile or barren and they have been cloning the how ever many people are in the city over and over again to make sure the human race survives. 

 I guess not making multiples of the same person because they don't want inbreeding or something vague reasons defined. also their is brain wi-fi conference call pills,surveillance disruption eggs, recorded water messages, voice controlled ball bearings, and a woman with hands for feet... and hands for hands. But none of that particularly Bothers me at all if anything i find that all those are tame comparison to the show or comic. The whole Affair commits the Action Movie catastrophe of being incredibly boring, it has a handful well done action bits and Charlize Theron in skimpy outfits but with the pacing and flow of Ketchup out of a glass bottle"nothing happening, nothing happening, nothing happening, nothing happening, nothing happening, oh shit every thing's drowning in tomato. 

Bottom Line if you know and liked the show you aren't going to like this movie at all. if you don't know the show its a movie that will leave you with the feeling of "well that happened"  and that's about it. I give it a 4/10 almost middle of the road but not quite there.

The FP

you have no idea what you're in for...

no seriously you haven't got a damn clue i thought i did when i first read the synopsis of this movie and trust me you have no idea. hell i pre-screened the movies' first 10 minutes and i thought it was silly and that that was all it was going to be. But when the whole movie is full of dialogue like this.

     i can only say one thing to that. the man who made this movie is a absolute genius. So brilliant in fact i needed a 50/50 of whiskey and mountain dew to psych myself up to watch this movie again. so lets hop too it this shall be in a slightly different style from the previous reviews due to the fact i don't want to spoil this movie because it seems not many have seen it and its worth a watch especially if you have netflix because its a watch instantly title. ok first thing i must say is this is a movie shot and directed to be not unlike a sports movie mixed with step it up only major difference is this is in the "sci-fi Future" and its between two gangs in the small town of Frazier Park(FP) who settle their disputes rather than with pistols(just wait) no they settle their differences with Death DDR.
    Whoops that would Be copyright infringement ummm Beat Beat Revelation. also in the future people no longer speak English, there are no black people, and pagers and hanging out in garages has made a comeback. in other words its a dystopian future. the movie is about essentially 2 brothers J-tro and B-tro. B-tro is the older brother that in the beginning of the movie "battles" our villain LdubbaE  and dies from beat beating to hard? and his brother J-tro swears to never play beat beat revelation again.. the rest follows a Rocky movie path where due to a lot of training and small battles he gets his mojo back and fights for the 248 against the 245.
 think it interests you at all watch this movie you will i guarantee quote this at one point and as they would say in FP land you gotta check a look at this movie. i give this a cheesy 8 out of 10 you need something to riff and laugh you'll love this one.
 P.S. plus the end scene is mind blowing among other things.

A Triumphant return and A Little background

I....LIVE.........AGAIN

hello everyone who isn't currently reading this BlackLance now returned from a long long overdue and long escape from the world. I have come to behold the lack of character and design of this site and its contents which i hope to breath new life into. Unfortunately it appears that i will be for the most part solo writing for the site for A. it is something i enjoy and B. i can actually achieve deadlines when it comes to writing these so i shall start from scratch which is pretty much where i was to begin with. I will try to come up with good well rounded content and hopefully a few guest articles for now. shortly i hope to move this up to a podcast level so there won't be quite so much pesky reading involved and more people will be willing to hear my point of view than read my long winded articles. 

  For those of you who actually do read this feel free to comment, subscribe, or just give a suggestion of another movie you'd like me to check out I'm always on the hunt for new horrible. and hopefully it shall be enjoyed by all. hopefully by tomorrow i will have another Review Up for The Fp which believe me will have its day in the sun vocally at some point i can't talk enough about that movie. anyways Cheers and thanks to anyone who still checks this out.